The last two weeks of 2019 were amazing. I was off work, and more importantly, spent time with the woman I love (and her Pug, Puggy, can’t forget about him). Sadly, all good things come to an end.
Toward the end of the vacation, I was already shifting into “dread” mode. It happens so often, I have a name for it: Judge Dredd (from the bad Stallone movie, which ironically I did not dread to see). I started thinking about all the things I would need to catch up on. I was dreading the nightmare of an email inbox I would be returning to. I was dreading the uncertainty that comes with the next phase of the upgrade project. I was dreading the week ahead and everything it would entail.
Dreading takes its toll swiftly and without warning. It was harder to meditate. I started to feel the stress physically manifested in my body. My sleep was disrupted with bouts of waking up in the middle of the night with my mind racing. Anyone who knows me knows that this is unacceptable.
Then the week happened. Actually, it flew by. My inbox was not that bad. Nothing blew up while I was out. I accomplished several important tasks. Now that the week is over, I look back and have a realization:
Dreading the week was worse than experiencing the week.
I have been thinking about how many times I have these two reactions:
A: “Hey, that wasn’t as bad as I thought.”
B: “Wow, that was worse than I expected.”
The vast majority of the time it’s A. We are wired to think of worst-case scenarios. “Hope for the best but expect the worst.” That’s survival mode, but who wants to be in constant survival mode, fearing for the worst outcome that is just around the corner? Not me.
This experience reminded me to stop dreading. It’s much healthier (and more fun) to look forward to experiences rather than dread them.
Sure, that’s easy to say.
“Man I can’t WAIT to get that root canal!”
“It’s so FUN writing an $800 check for car repairs!”
“I can’t wait to do my taxes and see how much I’m allowed to contribute to my government to ensure it runs properly and serves all the needs of my fellow citizens.”
The key for me is to be grateful. I have a daily habit of recognizing at least three things for which I’m grateful. Gratitude helps keep Judge Dredd away.